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’ ‘Self-punishment?’ Jackie asks scared for Keith. ‘In his head. He has prided himself on being a nice guy and making others feel good and loved. He enjoys seeing people smile even if it happens to be at his own expense. When he hurts someone he cares about, he has a tendency to shutoff and become distant.’ Jackie was starting to understand Keith better but something still nagged her. ‘You said his self-punishment is getting worse. Why?’ ‘It is not for me to tell, even if I had all the details. I just know him well enough to let him process everything in his own way and let him be him.’ ‘Is there any way I could possibly help?’ Andy smiles seeing Jackie’s concern for Keith. ‘If you decide to try to talk to him again when he comes back another night, be yourself. Don’t try to talk to him about his past, just help him feel cared about and be a good friend.’ Jackie nods accepting what Andy’s advice is. Still, she wants to do more for him. Even as bad as she felt, she felt like Keith. I felt a bit wobbly but managed to walk in a straight line. Charlie held my coat as I was putting it on. He stood very close to me. Closer than he needed to, I noticed. I did not move away. We all walked out of the restaurant together. Joy and I had insisted on paying our dinners even though some of the boys had offered to pay our bill. We walked slowly in a loose group on the sidewalk. The two guys who were obviously not interested walked in front I had one lad on each side of me and same for Joy. This was quite a joyous group and banter was light and fun. I felt a bit cold but having these young men treat me like a princess was warming me up. Joy caught up to me and whispered "which one do you like best?" "I am not decided yet but let's not get ahead of ourselves. You like James don't you?" "I do fancy him as they say here" I noticed the boys were having a similar chat. They were behind me so I focused on walking as sexy as I could. Even with the long coat, they would see my hips.
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